I feel so grateful for freedom from flour and sugar. Before FA, I had times when I would largely eat like I am now and then other times when I just could not stop eating. It was so painful. I could not understand what was wrong with me or how I could stop.
I lived alone. Although I kept no sugar or flour products in my home, there were basic ingredients that I could use for a quick fix, or I’d go out to stores I’d previously declared out of bounds, telling myself to stop this insane behavior. I tried better self-care, affirmations, photos of how I wanted to look, hanging up a garment I wanted to fit into, envisioning a thinner me, rewards, tallying up money spent on junk food, awareness I wasn’t eating out or buying clothes but spending money on flour and sugar products. Buying cheap fixes, buying so much I’d feel full of sugar and flour and not need more, throwing away what was extra (in the bag), only to retrieve it the next morning, eating only the most healthy sugar and flour fixes, eating too much of even healthy food, using a smaller plate. But today and for the last 11-plus years, my Higher Power has kept me from the first bite.
Every day, a day at a time, my Higher Power, who is bigger than the disease which is bigger than me, keeps me abstinent and in recovery in a slender body with a one-size wardrobe. With energy previously used for the next fix now available for my tools of recovery, I’m staying abstinent and writing down my food, making phone calls, going to meetings, taking quiet time, reading two pages of the AA big book per day, and being of service to my fellowship.
Such a better way to live and to be. I highly recommend it. Are there any takers?