The first time I visited my brother after joining Program was an incredible experience. Through geographical circumstances, my brother and sister-in-law wound up being responsible for the care of our aging mother. It was not easy for them. My brother would often call me to vent his anger, and I would try to tell him what to do. If that didn’t work, I would dismiss his needs and feelings and say, “I am too tired to listen.”
This first visit in recovery was awesome. My brother and I went on an errand. Again he started to tell me how he was feeling, and then he stopped and said, “You wouldn’t listen anyway.” I said, “Yes I would, I am different now, so please tell me what you are thinking.” He began kind of hesitantly and then continued to pour his heart out. We sat in a parking lot for a very long time and I listened and listened. Afterward he said, “You are different.” I was so happy and felt so serene. That was almost seven years ago, and our relationship has been wonderful ever since.