A few years ago, I had experienced multiple issues with my laptop and phone, which were quite confusing. I had been trying, unsuccessfully, to get the FA mp3s from my laptop onto my phone. Being in FA, I am continually reminded that it’s healthy to ask for help.  I’ve learned that if I can ask for help with my food in the form of quantity and type, etc., then I can also choose to ask for help in all other areas of my life.

I found myself at the Apple Store in the mall.  My food addict insecurity blossomed and the thoughts in my head were saying things like I’m too drab, too poor, too unsophisticated to be here, and so on.  I responded with the FA truism, “I am enough, I have enough, I do enough.” I prayed that God would help me to relax. After all, I was on a mission, as I needed the mp3s to be on my phone for the new FA meeting that we were opening. Other meetings were also in need of this technology and I was ready to make this happen. When I considered my purpose, I relaxed. When I consider that I’m asking for help in order to be of service to others, I find it easier than if I were only asking on behalf of myself.

The guy at the Apple Store was awesome and quickly got it all sorted out! I was so happy and relieved that I asked him if I could rave about his abilities to management. He gave me permission, however it was necessary for me to wait for about 15 minutes until the manager was available. Since he had been helping me load the mp3s, he was familiar with the FA website and said the magic words, “Tell me more about this FA program.” I felt elated, yet vulnerable. I asked God for help, and then we had a really nice conversation. I explained that I used to go to parties a lot and had done all kinds of things, but eventually I realized that food was a primary issue for me. It wasn’t just the concern about getting fat, but also how I felt about myself, as I knew I couldn’t stop eating and practicing bulimia. I asked him questions and tailored my responses to his experiences. God helped me to keep our discussion situationally appropriate; we were in his place of work, and I did not want him to feel uncomfortable.

Finally, his manager approached us, and I was able to provide her with some glowing feedback. I walked out of the mall shaking my head in wonder at how my Higher Power works. My questions had been answered, recovery seeds had been planted, my insecurity about whether I was “good enough” to be in the mall had vanished, and the day was still young!